All I can think of is REBIRTH...

My spirit is screaming time for rebirth, renewal, just want another start. Ever been there where you want God to just make you over? Just want another beginning. Taunet Nelel, in my language. A clean slate. This is where I'll be fully honest with what I am facing. I am ready for change.

2010, what can I tell you? You've been a hard year. Yes, life is not meant to ever get easier, this I know. Its been a fight, its been walking away from the darkness brokenness and into the light of God's love and grace. He has carried me through this year but I walked away for a while. I was distracted, confused and just needed a solution RIGHT THEN. I didn't want to wait but it is always the most helpful thing to wait on the Lord. I am witness to that.

I am in a stage where I'm ready for God to act, ready for God to show up, ready to seek again. Fall in love passionately with Him all over again. Let Him have my heart and ask Him to empty me of everything that has taken up His place there. I am ready to just SEEK FIRST THE KINGDOM. I will have nothing if I do not have God to begin with. That is just truth.

I love Him for His grace because, if it were me..I would have left Cheruto a long time ago. Like the Footprints story, I think I finally see the one set of footprints when God held me next to his bosom and said 'child, just rest..am here, you don't have to fight, you don't need to fight. Just lean on me. I've been there, I bore that same pain. I cried the same tears. So trust me when I say, I am carrying you through this.'

Amen